Relationality

Well its late night here, and I haven't really posted anything on this for a while, so I apologize.

I really don't feel right sharing spiritual things when I'm struggling in my spiritual life, but hey, these posts are more for myself than for who reads them, I need to realize that and stop taking so much pride in this blog.

Anyway, I thought I would take the time to do a little thought throwing.

There is a string of thoughts and logic that has always been fascinating and has been helping me see God more clearly.

Pardon me, but I'm just going to get right into it.

God is Love

Part of God's fundamentalism is his relationality.

 The binding force of the universe is love, which God is the definition of.

The main aspect of Love is self-sacrifice, or giving.

 John 3:16 He GAVE himself because LOVE.
Gal 2:20 LOVED me, so he GAVE
Eph 5:25 GAVE himself for LOVE, like a Husband to Wife

Its not just any giving, so many people give out of what they have or they feel they can give up fairly, they don't give until they are convinced the money or whatever isn't theirs to begin with.

But real giving, the Love giving, is where you possess something that is in all fairness yours, but you give it up anyways.

Side note: This is an aspect I struggle with, even recently I had to give up something very important to me, I thought I possessed it justly and fairly and that I saw no reason for it to be wrong, so why give it up?

What I had, I may perfectly well have in the future but I wanted to possess it by my own timing and I awakened it before it desired. So I gave it up because though it was a good thing, I needed to give it, because I want to Love God, and that means sacrifice even of things I may think I deserve.

In the end, God will choose to give me what I need the most and Ill trust him for the future. I gave for him, and I know I can't out-give God. So I will trust and Obey.

Our creator, our Father is fundamentally love. Love is something that is acted upon to another. It is something you can't have by yourself. You must have an object of affection, and object to sacrifice for.

That's why God in his nature is plural not singular, because before he created any being he would have not had an object to be love to. Unless its as Pastor Asscherick said it a sort of "Divine Family."

Even without creation God is still Love, because the Father, Son and Holy Spirit Love each other.

Same thing with man, he need to likewise have a horizontal Love, not just vertical. So God gave Eve or a woman to be with us men. So now, as a man, the object of my affection and the being I am going to supremely sacrifice for on this earth is whomever I marry. The goal is to give, not to take in the marital relations. God is the perfect example of this.

He gave himself for us, the church, his sinful erring children.

Jesus knew, when he created us that it would cause him death. Isn't that almost idiotic?

Not to be irreverent but by all human standards that is like suicide or something. He would kill himself eternally to save his failing creation. Why?

Its his nature, he desires our happiness, our fulfillment, or eternity and existence above his own. Why would God, the almighty do such a thing...?

That's the beauty, its part in the unfathomable mystery of what LOVE really is... Who God really is...

Sacrifice, in life and in death, perfectly purposed to rescue me and you.

Indecision

So I had mentioned I was going to talk about my experience with Temptation, and things I've learned. But before I can really share that there are some more foundational topics I wanted to mention.

A lot of of people, like as myself have been caught in a little lie. Just a little one.

This lie is a favorite teaching of the world. It has to do with the middle ground.

You, dear reader may or may not be aware that there is a battle for your soul. Sometimes you may be aware of it, somedays it may not even cross your mind.

This battle, this fight, this controversy is between two sides. These sides have characteristics. 

Unfortunately though, you can't avoid entering this war. Upon existence, every rational, conscious entity chooses a side. And the middle ground is where most people want to be, this middle ground is where you don't have to worry about the war. People so desperately want to believe this area exists. That they can not choose a side.

Let me do some clearing up of what these two "sides" are in the fight you and I are in.

Most widely known as

Good and Evil,
Light and Darkness.

Sin and Righteousness

Giving and Taking

Love and Hate

There are just two sides. So so many people are trying to find this area of compromise, an area where they can comfortably Sin. And unfortunately, "Seek and you shall find" is applicable here.

People will against God to do what they would like, and the will is something God has given as a gift and will never overpower you. He pleads but never compels you to choose. The topic of the power of the will is important and I am going to talk about it later.

But back to the main idea. Jesus very much new this middle ground existed and understood its role in the battle. This deception is probably one of Satan's favorite ploys. Getting you to become lackadaisical or careless in your effort to be like Jesus.

In one of the verses in Revelation, about a simple thing like water temperature, he clearly reveals the inner workings of this trap.

Rev 3:14-16

 "And unto the angel of the church of the Laodiceans write; These things saith the Amen, the faithful and true witness, the beginning of the creation of God; 

I know thy works, that thou art neither cold nor hot: I would thou wert cold or hot. So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth."

This is definitely the position of the majority, and sadly I have seen how my life was lukewarm.

Many people believe in and desire salvation and heaven but make no efforts in bringing God's sanctifying power into their life.

Truly the fallen angels desire to return to the celestial glories of heaven, and believe it more real than we, but the lukewarm, "in need of nothing" Christians, are in a similar position to Satan and his angels, believing and desire heaven but will inevitably lack a fitness for it. 

"What greater deception can come upon human minds than a confidence that they are right when they are all wrong! the message of the True Witness finds the people of God in a sad deception, yet honest in that deception." 3T 252, 253

Matt 7:21-23

"Not every one that saith unto me, Lord, Lord, shall enter into the kingdom of heaven; but he that doeth the will of my Father which is in heaven. Many will say to me in that day, Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in thy name? and in thy name have cast out devils? and in thy name done many wonderful works? And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye that work iniquity."

Many, like myself, have been caught in a lie. That they have nothing to do but be believe, mentally realize that we can go to heaven. And thats it, the Christian experience stops there and we wait till we die. But what a deception, how evil our hearts become when we do not do the  will of the Father. Even as a professed Christian in words, we profess Satan by our  un-christlike actions. Jesus hates sin, and sin is the transgression of the law (1 John 3:4) We must be obedient to the commands of Jesus, aligning ourselves everyday anew to the side of light.

Now, will you remain between good and evil, holding onto known sin and things that bring you away from rightousness and purity or will you "choose you this day whom ye will serve"

1 John 3:6-9

"Whosoever abideth in him sinneth not: whosoever sinneth hath not seen him, neither known him. Little children, let no man deceive you: he that doeth righteousness is righteous, even as he is righteous. He that committeth sin is of the devil; for the devil sinneth from the beginning. For this purpose the Son of God was manifested, that he might destroy the works of the devil. Whosoever is born of God doth not commit sin; for his seed remaineth in him: and he cannot sin, because he is born of God."

"Indecision will soon become decision in the wrong direction" T4 344

If not now, when?

Satan seeks whom he will devour, if you wait in indecision he WILL catch you, like paralyzed prey.

Or will you choose Jesus, who will give you hinds legs to run from the lion to safety.

Choose to be like Jesus today more than ever before.


May God bless you,

Amen

The unknown

There is just to much in life we don't know.

Where will my help come from?

No matter who you are, or where your from, this question rings a points in your life.

Money can't save you from death. Life doesn't immediately mean comfort. Comfort doesn't ensure happiness.

Many see the obvious difficulties of health, and money, or finding comfort. But the pursuit of happiness is often illusory.

Happiness never seems to last, to most people, its more like a poison.
The object of happiness has, to so many, turned sour after sweet. Quickly fading from fresh air into a thick miasma of disappointment.

Why? Why are so many caught, blissfully self-deceived that this next boyfriend, girlfriend, season of sports, exciting video game or movie, career or otherwise, the list goes on, all through materialism and emotions, hoping in the probability that this next experience will finally deliver them what they have been searching for?

Some things are inherently negative, some are supposedly beneficial, but it all lets us down, always leaving unfulfilled ... The problem I dare say, isn't the object of our affections, it is us......

If you have the right mindset, you will not seek the obvious destruction, when you are a honest Christian seeking to not just avoid evil, but to do right (or be righteous), evil will become more and more obvious as your innocence makes you more sensitive to it.

The sanctified or divinely created pleasures will bring a happiness and satisfaction, but even these will only be for a time.

Why? Because we will take this pleasure, this right action and eventually compromise it's integrity.

How? Evil will suggest ideas to take small steps outside the boundaries spoken by God, then motivation, reasons to justify these small compromises will take there stand against scripture.

These thought or suggestions are fashioned to slip under the radar, to pierce our conscious defense of disobedience to God. These are like "fiery darts". Then slowly but surely we WILL PERVERT or change the once clear instruction from God into a self guided and perfectly justifiable sin.

 Thus we need follow through in our personal duty to uphold the sanctity of the experience we are experiencing.

Unless we strive to sacrifice, to leave indulgence in personal desires behind, these God-given pleasures will also turn to ash.

My favorite author said, in reference to the Satan's strategy.

" He will endeavor to excite the emotions, to arouse the passions, to fasten the affections on that which is not for your good; but it is for you to hold every emotion and passion under control, in calm subjection to reason and conscience." OHC 87.3

You see, impulse is Satan's favorite trap, to get us to take action first before applying principle.

Reminds me of another quote related to impulse in relation to one of the most pondered aspects of humanity, Love.

"True love is not a strong, fiery, impetuous passion. On the contrary, it is calm and deep in its nature." LYL 30.1

So many today have access to knowledge of God but do not take it into account during temptation.
Now to finish off the first quote, after we control ourselves by reason and conscience.

"Then Satan loses his power to control the mind. The work to which Christ calls us is to the work of progressive conquest over spiritual evil in our characters. Natural tendencies are to be overcome.... Appetite and passion must be conquered, and the will must be placed wholly on the side of Christ." OHC 87.3

The next lesson on that page is about my personal struggle with temptation.

Its about the single most important principle to overcoming sin that I have ever encountered.

That will be for my next post.

" Now may the God of peace... make you perfect in every good work to do his will, working in you that which is wellpleasing in his sight, through Jesus Christ; to whom be the glory for ever and ever. Amen"
Heb 13:20-21

Jesus loves me this I know

The phrase, "Jesus loves me this I know", has never meant more to me than today. There is a point in life that I have reached when I asked for Gods help. I cried out to God, over and over, expecting nothing.

God was listening though, to the unutterable cry of my soul. My life very drastically changed in moments. But...

Even when the valley of the shadow of death is of your own doing he is there.

I always thought that the verse

Psalms 23:4;5
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.

Would mean I am being attacked, or I have been surrounded, God will surely come to my rescue.

But friends, I have a report, it is much more precious a promise than that. Much lovelier a treat.

Even when we, fully knowing where the enemy is, or seeing death ahead, willfully and purposely walk forward, no matter how far into enemy territory we tread, or how deeply we walk into the valley of death (sin). We are followed, we are watch, every step to darkness is recorded by God, he notes our slightest shift away from his presence.

Knowing this fact, one might say he recorded and notes for Judgement, he follows us, to take evidence of our need of destruction.

Friends, brothers and sisters, he follows, he records, he traces us for a better purpose, a nobler goal, a higher reason.

Our redemption!

His thoughts are higher than ours, so much higher!

Isaiah 55:8;9
For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.

He chastens us, when you are submitted to him, he refines you in the fire of affliction.

This fire, at least in my case, is a fire kindled by my own hand. But praise God, he can even use a sinner like me, who starts his own fire, and walks deeply into the valley of death, not in ignorance but it full knowledge.

How gracious God is to us, to me. He surely does not desire sacrifice, but mercy, obedience.

The wise surely have said, fear can force a man to change, but love, or loving mercy of our God, this love can make a man want to change.

Obedience is only true obedience out out of love, not fear.

Today I have known fear, my life lost, my future in ruin.

But the promise, the hope of Jesus Christ, who gladly bears my sin....

For what end? Our creator, sinless, mighty, and worthy of all honor takes my destruction, my sin, my weakness, my defilement... For what end?

To receive me.

What wondrous love is this...

Glory to God, for this day he has shown his endless love, and mercy to me...

And in return?

John 5:14
Afterward Jesus findeth him in the temple, and said unto him, Behold, thou art made whole: sin no more, lest a worse thing come unto thee.

He just wants me to "sin no more". To obey his Law, to exemplify order in my life according to his statues...

That is my duty, as a forgiven sinner.

May I ever remember this mercy, and I do take hold of this promise "lest a worse thing come upon thee".

God has shown me he will give me up to my destructive habits, to redeem me. And he Loves me just enough to refine me again, and again, and again.

If you read this, pray I "sin no more."

All this is only possible because of the sacrifice of God, in Jesus Christ, by his precious redeeming blood, which makes the Sinful heard by the Sinless.

In that name, I do say.

Amen

Burning Out

(I want to add a little disclaimer here before a begin, If it hasn't been clear already, I recognize the great controversy of control in my life, and that being said, much of what I right is from the occurrences and battles of self vying for control.)

I have yet another conundrum of difficulty I have subjected myself to, I have found myself in this spiral of dispiritation multiple times this summer. And the following thoughts are the catalyst.

I have been fighting thoughts of worthlessness.

And before you even think it, I know, as a Christian I should remember what God thinks of me. But that's not my problem necessarily, I am supposed to be a preacher, I feel called to help others, yet I go out to do so, and fail, my time, energy and efforts feel so squandered and even feel as if they are being a negative. I have not seen hardly any accomplishment, spiritually or otherwise all summer and my focus has been to spread the Gospel by books and even that is dragging me down.

I am definitely afraid, afraid I am truly useless.

This all wouldn't be that much of a problem if it wasn't for sin in my life. I fail to stay on the narrow path almost everyday. Right now I don't even know what path I'm on.

(I wrote all that last night)

Now today, after some prayer and spiritual nourishment my mind is leveling out.

I have been feeling so negative and downtrodden about the trouble I've been going through.

Somehow I feel as if I should be getting worldly success and blessing as a child of God. But I am reminded of the beauty of steadfast principle in followers of God in the Bible.

Job undoubtedly faces some of the harshest circumstances. But I was curious to what he had that I didn't that drove him even through God approved suffering.

Amidst hurt, and immense anguish, his own wife, the woman supposedly supporting him and bringing him closer to God said "Do you hold fast to your integrity? Curse God and die!" Job 2:9 NKJV

And this is the principle and view point  I am missing, and in missing this I am poisoned by my frustration and pride just as Job's wife.

Job's response (As if God was speaking to me) "You speak as a foolish women speaks. Shall we indeed accept good from God, and shall we not accept adversity?" Job 2:10 NKJV

There it is, I had thought of such an idea, but from scripture it is so plain.

I am exactly what the devil has a accused me of. A follower of God because the goodness of God to me, my motivations are wrong, Job had it right, there was a deeper meaning to why he served God. And God has a deeper plan than giving us prosperity.

In Job's life, God worked out the precious plan of redemption.

Our goal is not to find prosperity from Gods hand, our goal is not to live life comfortably, it is to become like Jesus.

And to do that, to become a child of God, accusation from Satan must be tested against us, and we must suffer.

Hebrews 12:11 Says "Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it." NKJV

Notice here is the equation for righteousness, painful chastening by God.

And the point is furthermore brought out in 1 Peter 5:11 "But may the God of all grace, who called is to His eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after you have suffered a while, perfect, establish, strengthen and settle you." NKJV

Suffering is a necassary component and should be welcomed by the Christian.

We have ultimately been called the take the cross of suffering and adversity just as our God has. Not the "cross" of self seeking, searching for pleasure or idleness, just wait sloth fully for our Lords coming. If we aren't working for the Lord and sharing in his adversity and finding pleasure in the difficult per suit of righteousness by Gods chastening hand, we will be to brittle to stand when the time comes.

We are Gods treasure, just as a blacksmith shapes and forms his tools for usefulness we must submit to the fire, and hammering of God to be redeemed to our right place.

All in all, I'm still struggling, I'm still tempted to think I have failed, but the truth is, God won't break me through adversity, I will only be a useless broken tool, when I give up.

May God be with you, and shape you into his likeness.

Amen

Revival

I praise God, because the Holy Spirit works in us to conform to the image of God.

Last week was possibly the most difficult, depressing week Ive had. But counsel rings true, I was having a hard time starting dvotions, and i was not talking with God and spending time with him.

As a result, depression, self-relience, pain, frustration and discouragment settled.

I never want that feeling, that experience, to happen again.

God is always there to be found. He waits to share blessings and treasures with you as you begin to search for him again.

This past Sabbath was a blessing, among difficulty and depression from the week, Sabbath revived my heart towards Jesus.

I was reminded of the importance of the canvassing work, and to what purpose it serves in spreading the gospel.

Though a seperated myself from the Lord through my self sufficiency, I am happy as ever to be back and once again cast my cares upon him.

One care I had was imediately taken care of, and relief was brought to my heart. And yet another soon after.

Even after all the knowledge and experience with God and knowing how much he has done for me, I selfishly hoarded my time. But even after denying him, with full knowledge of what may come, He still greatly recieved me back to him with blessings waiting in the doorway as soon as I opened it.

God is good.

I beg you, if you ar reading this, and the Holy Spirit has put a burden on your heart to give more time to God, or just to focus on him more. Pray, seek, and God will recieve you and wash you, he did me, and my sins were great, many that would be repulsive to all. Purposely giving my heart into the hands of the Satan, yet when I turned to Jesus he shelterd me from the self inflicted storm.

Praise God.

This week will be a blessing, pray for me, pray for us who are laboring for souls.

Even a great destructive storm gives life giving rain to those looking to grow.

Blessings, keep burning for God.

Life, Now

So its about 2 AM in the morning. In 12 hours Ill be at an airport to go to Michigan, and In less time than that I will hopefully see my new born niece, because my sister is in labor right now... As I type.

The strange circumstances that stem from such events, like a new life be born, or my lack of sleep, or my excitement for the environmental change from my home to the canvassing work, have spurred this little thought blending post I'm currently typing.

These past two weeks have been exactly about what I hoped they wouldn't be.

On the outside, its been a grand ole time. I got to preach, a wonderful God given message this past Sabbath. I learned so much about God through watching sermons. Even did some climbing and exploring with a friend, had some mini adventures. 

On the inside, Its been a power struggle. The fear I had expressed about my going home has definitely rooted itself. I've faced and failed so much spiritual warfare these past weeks, and sunk so low. Even at the point of wanting to forsake everything God had for me, even now I feel as if my failures have somehow made me unworthy of all the blessing I see God wants to bestow upon me in the future. 

So many things plaguing me. The thoughts of unworthiness, the contemplations of turning my back, giving up. My biggest struggle revolves around my self worth. On one hand, I am prideful, I am confident in somethings, and beat myself up because I know I shouldn't be so proud. And on the other I see certain people, as so much better than me, and me like some sort of annoyance or disease on others, thinking to myself, certain people would be better having not ever known me. But again I know to that I am not that worthless Im worth something. at least I think I am... Right?

But I know were all this difficulty and insecurity comes from. I've been in spiritual darkness, which carries over to darken many other aspects of life.

I need more light.

And I praise GOD! because just like the crazed demon possessed men off the shores of Galilee, I too see the Savior. I will be saved from this pit of despair, and have been thankfully provided with away to share sufferings and true life with Jesus through sharing on Gospel during canvassing.

I cant wait to start. Canvassing is a life giving experience. I have been starving of life because I have not been giving life to others.

 Without giving, there is no love, and no love means, no life, and death will seem preferable to life.

So I hope, that if you reading this feel a deadness in yourself, start giving, and shine light in your darkness. 

Disclaimer: If that made any sense, praise the Lord. Like usual I am not rereading this post, so I hope its not confusing, cause Its late, and my head is throwing a bunch of stuff around.